I definitely like discussing Facebook rules. It constantly seems to be a questionable subject-- and for great factor. For the life of me I cannot find out why people put so much stock into their Facebook life.
Facebook Adding Friends For Me
" Did you see my status today? Why didn't you see my status? When will you Like my status?"
Yeesh, enough already!
I even composed an article called "Genuine" Buddies vs. Facebook Buddies that talked about how worked up some of us get about adding "buddies" to our network.
But adding friends to your list is all a part of the Facebook fun, right? Incorrect!
It's not a race, it's not a competitors, and you should not be too eager to send a pal demand to somebody you simply met or only talked with for seven seconds in the elevator. So, prior to you spend hours waiting anxiously in front of your computer to see if Beth-- who you have never talked to but see in the corridor every day - will accept your demand, let's pull back the veil of Facebook relationship.
Here are my leading 3 Quick and Dirty Tips on how quickly you can legally friend somebody on Facebook:
Tip 1: The New Romance
Okay class, by a program of hands, the number of of you have stalked someone on Facebook?
Begin now, I do not see every hand up ... since it should be.
Facebook stalking (in the safe/non-threatening sense) is when you look up a total stranger, or someone you loosely understand, and take a self-guided trip of their page. The image album entitled "Summer 2013"-- don't mind if I do!
This especially happens when you are about to go on a date with someone or have simply gone a very first date. So as you're exchanging stories about what you like to do on the weekends, an idea comes to mind, "Should I friend them?" Then you teeter back and forth, uncertain if you should make the first move. It's like a social video game of ping pong with one side of your brain saying, "Naturally! Go all out, they'll love it!" and the opposite saying, "Wait ... I'll look like a stalker."
After a date is over, you generally have a great idea of whether or not there will be a second date. And therein lies your answer. If you can see this person being a "buddy"-- either platonically or with advantages - then it's a yes. However, if you believe to yourself, "I'm not sure I wish to see this person once again," then the response is most likely "No" to including them as a Facebook good friend.
Let's be truthful, you won't get an award for having 10,000 good friends on Facebook, and you won't be kicked out for having only 10. If you're stressed about whether to extend a good friend request or not, make certain that you can genuinely call them a friend in the very first place (or a minimum of that they're somebody with pal potential). When you include an individual to your facebook circle, they'll see whatever you do. They'll find out if you're "in a relationship" and if you put "it's made complex" as your status while dating them. They have access to your every relocation ... awwwwkward.
So if you see this opting for more than a few dates or staying "just pals," then go for it. Nevertheless, if there is any doubt, do not feel obligated to accept their demand or extend one yourself. You do not owe a complete stranger a window into your social life.
Tip 2: The Office "Good friend".
Facebook in the workplace is like diving in an old boat wreck-- you never know exactly what freaky things you'll discover around each dark turn when you dig deep enough.
Take one Modern Good manners Person Facebook good friend, Mike, who asked me about friending a good young woman named Stephanie, who operates in the cube across from him. He said she is funny, constantly willing to assist out a fellow colleague, never ever grumbles about having to burn the midnight oil, and is normally the perfect colleague. However, the one thing Mike didn't point out was that he's only been at this job for 6 days and has yet to utter a single word to Miss Terrific. He looked her up on Facebook (Stalker, table for one!) and it turns out they have a lot in common. Oh, yeah, other than for one minor detail like in fact being buddies!
The workplace is no location to take risks with Facebook. If you are not buddies in real life, you can't be pals on Facebook. It's that basic. So in Mike's case, I advised him to hold back till he had at least one discussion with Stephanie where they linked on a non-work issues such as food, TELEVISION, motion pictures, hobbies, and so on. This is where a genuine friendship happens. Not just speaking about spreadsheets or conferences.
I told him that if Stephanie got his good friend request without ever having contact with him in the past, she would more than likely think 3 things:.
- Mike - who is Mike? Oh, wait, is it that guy across from me? We're not friends.
- Wait a 2nd, did he look my name up on Facebook simply to find me? Ewww.
- If I do not accept he'll understand since we see each other every day and it will be uneasy. I don't like him for putting me in this position.
See where I'm going here?
If you are really itching to make the "good friend" relocation, begin a pleasant discussion on a regular basis - in person. As you do this, raise something about Facebook like, "Oh, inspect this out, my good friend simply posted the funniest picture of his young puppy on Facebook." Now we're getting somewhere!
Then, while on the topic of Facebook, feel free to ask about whether the person is on it or not. See how they respond and aim to read it from there. Proceed further if-- and only if-- you feel there is a real friendship aside from, "Can you tell me where the conference room is?".
Tip 3: Crazy Loved ones.
Here's a couple of realities about social networks:.
- 60% of 50-60-year-olds are active on social networks.
- in the 65+ bracket, 43% are using social networks.
So there ought to be not a surprise that Facebook especially is not a "kid thing." Lots of older people are reaching out to relatives of any ages to link and capture up on the current news in their life. And that's great!
However, let's look at the case of one Modern Good manners Guy fan named Angela. She is an avid "Facebooker" and shares everything with her pals (her words). She jokes that she in fact overshares sometimes. At a recent family gathering, Angela reconnected with a cousin who is Ten Years older. Angela got house and sent a good friend request, her cousin accepted, however things went south a week later on. Ends up, her cousin was not a big fan of Angela's way of life. This cousin would send out messages informing Angela that she disagreed with her choices, her pictures, her status updates. Suddenly, Angela ended up being Member of the family Opponent # 1, all because she published bathing fit images from her journey to Mexico.
The thing about loved ones is that they have the tendency to get a totally free pass when it comes to sharing their opinions of you. Pals might keep back, or be more secured with their feelings, but relatives - man, oh man, they have less of a buffer (which, by the method, I do not believe is reasonable - but that's a topic for another episode).
For Angela, this is a case of not correctly determining your relationship with the person before sending out a good friend demand. Friending someone on Facebook sounds very easy: "I like this individual-- why not include them?" However, we have the tendency to forget that not everybody will value our funny bone or exactly what we share. When we good friend someone prior to finding out whether they're on our wavelength, we take the threat of angering them if they don't share our views. Constantly bear in mind that your innocent post may not be so innocent to someone with a different outlook on life. And now that you're "pals," they have the right to discuss it.